The Emotional Swings Can Be Hard

I don't normally write blog posts about my emotions, but today I wanted to explain the mood swings I get at times. I have been so agitated, pissed off, quick to anger. It is scary because when I'm like this, I tend to do really stupid, impulsive things. Days like today is when I'd delete my blog, facebook page or delete every cover video I've made on Youtube. It's scary. I also purposely try to offend people and say things that will make people mad at me. I actually feed off of the negative energy. That filter we all have on our brains, it sometimes stops working for me and it's exceedingly difficult to get it to turn back on.

I'm Disgusted

I'm just so disgusted with myself lately. The past 8 months? or so has been the worst roller coaster ride ever and I want off. I'm so sick of feeling like 265 different emotions every single day with no hope that this will ever end!

I have no friends, so this doesn't help and this is just too much for my husband to handle now. Who do I talk to? How do I communicate when I'm unable to?

I feel trapped and I have no idea how I'm going to make things better.