Thursday, March 5, 2009

Self-Reflection Volume I

When I started this blog, I really had no idea what it would be about or what would come of it. Sure I knew I'd be talking about adrenal fatigue, but looking back I was so naive. I had no idea what was to come in the next few years. This blog has allowed you (the readers) to follow me through my struggle with searching for answers to my health concerns. In addition to my struggles, this blog has allowed you to see me grow as a person, by breaking down old paradigms and rebuilding new ones. Sometimes my posts are frantic, upset, a little over the top. Other times you can hear the frustration in my words. I type what I am feeling at that moment even if it seems a little out there.

Within these past 2 years, I've gone from the all natural, never take medicine girl, to a person who finally understands why some medicines are necessary. Some examples I am thinking of off the top of my head includes cortef (HC), armour, bio-identical sex therapies, DDAVP etc. All of you have seen this change first hand.

I truly feel that my fear of taking prescription pills (whether synthetic or bio identical) has kept me sick far longer than necessary. That's not to say all Rx's are equal. There are more than plenty out there that will make you sick and even kill you. I see people on the FDC yahoo group that have this fear of medications too. Even with saliva results far worse than mine, they REFUSE to accept the fact that they need to take medicine. They'd rather stay sick than get better!

I found a post of mine from almost 2 years ago on the now closed STTM (stopthethyroidmadness) forum. The moderators were trying to work with me, telling me that I would probably need to take cortef and florinef to feel better. I completely dismissed this idea and said that I would only take licorice or adrenal cortex extract. It's fair to say that I was a total idiot. No wonder they didn't want to deal with me. If I had listened to the moderators, I might have at least felt better for a short time.

I look back at the person I used to be and want to hide my head in shame. I was so naive.

Some of the biggest breakthroughs this year was the discovery of mercury toxicity. It made me change the name and focus of my blog! Everything I thought I knew about chelation was completely wrong. All of these natural chelators are in fact more unpredictable than the synthetic ones such as DMPS and DMSA. If I wasn't open-minded to Dr. Cutler's research, I would have continued to use chlorella making myself sicker and sicker.

I have realized that without an open mind, there's no way I'll ever get better. I can't be afraid to accept whatever diagnosis I am given. I can't be afraid to take low dose hormone support, to give me back the life I used to have--(It's been so long I've almost completely forgotten what that was.)--

If you have found this website through google and suffer from a lot of the same problems as me, are you ready to accept it? Are you ready to take the steps necessary to get better? Even though it may require you to take medications, it will likely require you to make changes to your diets and lifestyles.

Are you ready? I'm definitely ready to do this and move on.

2 comments:

imgeha said...

A good post Dana. It is a road that many of us are travelling / have travelled. I KNOW that I wouldn't be getting better without my daily dose of prednisolone and Florinef, much as I dislike taking it. I know I will be on adrenal support for life. It is just a tragedy that mercury was ever put in our mouths, making treatment with these medications necessary.

Nicola

Birdlady said...

Thanks Nicola!

I know I need florinef. This is the only med that still makes me nervous though. It has a fluoride molecule in it...ugh. However, my salt wasting symptoms have been absolutely hellish these past 2 days. It's only going to get worse as it gets warmer out.

If I find out my pituitary function is low, I may need HC, armour, DDAVP (I do now), sex hormones and possibly even growth hormone.

I can't even imagine trying to balance all of those, but that's probably what will be my next journey!